Rest in Peace

And the cold, dark days have finally come again this year, just like past years, though it's going to be one of the darkest, unforgettable days ever. It's the last Thursday, when we were awakened by a call from village, news of Grandpa getting sick. While all in rush packing things to get back there, a second call rang, and he'd gone. It was rainy that day and that made things move a little slow since the house compound was sunken by water, almost knee-depth. It was really crowded then, with relatives and all. Some were mourning, some were composed. And it really bothered me to see adult crying. An eldest cousin then had encouraged - more to forced - me to be in there to represent the late's grandchildren while they were bathing the deceased. So I got in and watched them, who Dad was one of, clean the body, from the beginning to the end of the process. It's the least I could do anyway. Yeah, it was my first time and it wasn't that creepy, like I'd thought it would be. Too bad to see Dad cry, though. But Grandpa looked so peaceful then, face and body still, pale. And I'd kissed him, too, when everyone did that and someone, again, had encouraged me to do the same. I hadn't done this kind of things before but yeah, it was Grandpa, it's okay then. The rain stopped when we got to the graveyard, yeah, quite a blessing for us, things easier. So it was done and all. But there were things that I didn't feel very right of myself. I did feel sad but I just didn't shed any tear of sadness of losing him. Some people had noticed that and asked me. I don't know. I'd cried for stupid little things but not for this. And too, I hadn't contributed a lot of helping people run the funeral. How awful. We were already back home again on just the second day, as we were threatened by flood of our home here. Now everyone seems to recover from the losing and I'm here again, stranded, alone from mates, left inside. It's only the books that keep me from getting bored to death, it seems. Twilight Saga: New Moon's done and still on Eclipse at the moment.

In memory of,
AWANG B. ISMAIL
1933-2009